Convert to Islam
In those early days, nothing could have been more important to me than the guiding examples of people I loved and trusted through and through. Each of the three people put different parts of me at ease, so that I could grow into Islam slowly and on my own.
Aatif. Aatif showed me that my mind could accept Islam. Because if Aatif, with all his mental acuity, with his roving intellect, and his penchant to constantly question, to probe and poke at everything, if Aatif could accept Islam as an integral part of his life, intellectually and more comprehensively than just the intellect, I knew without a doubt that eventually I could too, even if the exact path was and still is dark to me beyond a hand's breadth of light.
Sahar. Sahar showed me that my soul could yearn for Islam. When people talk about goodness as a light on a Muslim's face, I always think of Sahar, her unique radiance and how at peace she is with herself relative to myself and so many others. Sometimes, when I first started praying, and even to this day when I pray, I think of Sahar praying beautifully... and I think to myself... Sahar can find so much peace with Allah... and something in my soul, knowing now that it is possible, yearns for Allah.
Faisal. Faisal showed me that my self could find space to exist and grow in Islam. His constant presence in my life helped anchor my sense of self without sacrificing faith or integrity, and his willingness to introduce me to Muslims who'd be good for me both after and before my conversion, all enabled me to take who I already was, and build on it with Islam at its center, instead of tearing it down and building anew. Faisal is and has always been himself--mostly he is unapologetic, sometimes he is brash and abrasive, but he is quietly soft-hearted and bears deep within him a profound faith that, somehow, manages to not only coexist with some of his outward behavior, but serves as the wellspring of the unseen character beneath. lol... and I figured... if Faisal can do it... so can I. And with his help... alhamdulillah... I've made a good start.
In those early days, nothing could have been more important to me than the guiding examples of people I loved and trusted through and through. Each of the three people put different parts of me at ease, so that I could grow into Islam slowly and on my own.
Aatif. Aatif showed me that my mind could accept Islam. Because if Aatif, with all his mental acuity, with his roving intellect, and his penchant to constantly question, to probe and poke at everything, if Aatif could accept Islam as an integral part of his life, intellectually and more comprehensively than just the intellect, I knew without a doubt that eventually I could too, even if the exact path was and still is dark to me beyond a hand's breadth of light.
Sahar. Sahar showed me that my soul could yearn for Islam. When people talk about goodness as a light on a Muslim's face, I always think of Sahar, her unique radiance and how at peace she is with herself relative to myself and so many others. Sometimes, when I first started praying, and even to this day when I pray, I think of Sahar praying beautifully... and I think to myself... Sahar can find so much peace with Allah... and something in my soul, knowing now that it is possible, yearns for Allah.
Faisal. Faisal showed me that my self could find space to exist and grow in Islam. His constant presence in my life helped anchor my sense of self without sacrificing faith or integrity, and his willingness to introduce me to Muslims who'd be good for me both after and before my conversion, all enabled me to take who I already was, and build on it with Islam at its center, instead of tearing it down and building anew. Faisal is and has always been himself--mostly he is unapologetic, sometimes he is brash and abrasive, but he is quietly soft-hearted and bears deep within him a profound faith that, somehow, manages to not only coexist with some of his outward behavior, but serves as the wellspring of the unseen character beneath. lol... and I figured... if Faisal can do it... so can I. And with his help... alhamdulillah... I've made a good start.
posted by Bloo at 10:16 PM
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