Seeing Farah today pretty much made my day. It was fun and nice to hang out with her. :-)

Defining memoriabilia

'defining' in this case is an adjective, not a verbal gerund. If that didn't make sense, one would hope it will become clear from context. (If any of you are literature freaks, you will also see that the first meaning, a verbal gerund, is also applicable if you choose to do some creative explication, although I assure you I did not intend it as such).




So, I was pondering my life as it has transpired thus far, as I am wont to do, and decided that... at least as far as intrinsically meaningless bits of memoriabilia that nonetheless MEAN something because they encapsulate eons of work that could otherwise not be summed into a single thing... I have, from high school, three such things: my 16th place california state speech and debate medal in lincoln douglas debate, my 3rd place medal for the overall league speaker award (in which I lost 2nd place to Tim by 1 point, bastard), and my high school yearbook, which I spent hours putting together with all the Makio kids, and which have the words and signatures of so many dearest friends, some still present some long gone, and pictures and pictures and pictures.

In college, I guess I have this University Medal Finalist thing, the certificate and the article. And... I figure that's a good one, because I felt I deserved it because of the sum of my efforts and work and even the little things that weren't explicitly manifest to the selection committee but which combine to create character and a better self.

I suppose that's a good one.

I can't wait till the next step.

I want to remind myself that even if I don't get into any of the arabic language programs...

... going back to grad school just because I've done well in school and can feel good about it and myself at the end... is not a sufficient reason to go back.

My Dad (memories from childhood and adolescence)

Reoccuring phrases from my dad:

(When complaining about a skinned knee, as a young child)

Dad: Want me to make it feel better?

Me: (nods head)

Dad: Ok. If I break your finger, you wont even feel your scraped knee anymore

Me: (runs away to mom)

(When playing ball)

Me: (misses a long throw)

Dad: Dive for it!

Me: But... we are playing on asphalt...

Dad: Take it for the team!

(When complaining about illness or accident)

Dad: Whatever doesnt kill you can only make you stronger.

Me: What about maiming, or permanent disabilities? Arent you a DOCTOR?!!

Hearing voices

Brian (walking through the hallway mumbling to himself)

Kevin (looks up from his computer): Did... one of your friends come over?

Brian: No. Why?

Kevin: I thought I heard someone talking.

Brian: Oh. No.

Kevin: Some weird high pitched voice.

Brian: That's strange.

Kevin: I must be going crazy.

shakespeare

Kevin: "'Oh! I am slain! [dies]'. That's the best line in Shakespeare"

I'm an orphan who grew up but never stopped feeling lost...

There is a phone ringing somewhere. It rings and rings in the distance. Who's calling?


Maybe I should pick it up.

Normally I wash my hands with dish soap in the kitchen sink whenever they've been dirtied, e.g. by taking out the trash, washing dishes, eating food, cleaning up, etc. But a week ago I happened to be closer to the bathroom sink and realized we have anti-bacterial hand soap that we never use, so I made a point, from there on, to wash my hands with the anti-bacterial hand soap and in the bathroom whenever I could, because I figured what's the point of having the soap if you never use it. (Plus at various points the kitchen sink has been so full of digustingly dirty dishes that I worry I'm actually dirtying my hands by bringing them near it).
So, yesterday I'm washing my hands with the anti-bacterial soap and kevin looks over and says, "Uh... Brian... why are you washing your hands with facewash?"
And Lo and Behold, what I thought was anti-bacterial soap was actually Neutrogena facewash. Kevin then asked if perhaps my hands had been feeling particularly dried out because the facewash apparently does a good job getting deep down into your pores.

Well, that explains that.

Idealists exist in the intersection of cynicism, denial, faith, and hope.

The life and times of Brian in college

When I look back, I am inclined to think, "I could have done so much more".

But I also know that I would not have wanted to do more, nor do I regret those moments of leisure, of indulgence, of inactivity, or lavish extravagance, because they are moments of joy, sadness, loss, love, and humanity.

We are never so unwise as we are in matters of the heart, and when they matter the most.

College Yearbook

Kevin: "Are you getting a yearbook, Brian?"

Brian: "Uh... No."

Kevin: "Yeah, that's what I was telling my parents. I was arguing about it with them for the past five minutes

"They kept telling me to get one.

"I was like, no.

"They were so insistent, 'Go buy a yearbook!'

"But I don't want one. 'Well, you got one in high school' they said.

"And I was like, but that's different.

"'You're GETTING a yearbook!'

"So I said ok.

"But I'm not gonna."

Conversation with myself

"I have hope for the future."

"You mean hope for the future of humanity?"

"Oh, no. I meant for my future ... humanity is screwed, clearly."

"Out of the other three profiles I read, you were definitely the most normal." --Anastasia Denisova

Without a doubt the most flattering thing anyone has said about my being a univ. medal finalist to date.

I take a certain mad pleasure in the last minute research effort.

Conversation with Jeffrey

bloo582: i'll bet it would be confusing living on the top or bottom of the earth's rotational axis
jsb 5354: ?
bloo582: day all the time during the summer, night during the winter, and a perpetual twilight/dawn in between
jsb 5354: oh
jsb 5354: sounds fun
jsb 5354: let's go
bloo582: well
bloo582: i hear the weather sucks
jsb 5354: oh, then let's not
bloo582: very well
bloo582: hehe
bloo582: i wonder if you'd get dizzy
jsb 5354: no way
bloo582: just standing there and spinning around
jsb 5354: you wouldn't be dizzy
bloo582: i know
jsb 5354: all the time
bloo582: but it'd be funny
jsb 5354: LOL
jsb 5354: damn
jsb 5354: you'd like
jsb 5354: throw up
jsb 5354: all day
bloo582: LOL
bloo582: ha ha ha ha
bloo582: man, let's definitely not go there
bloo582: but maybe send a test animal
bloo582: and observe him scientifically
jsb 5354: lol
jsb 5354: that would suck
jsb 5354: watch him throw up all day