I woke up this morning imagining the diverse yet fortunate parenting that went into making some of my favorite people on the planet the persons that they are. How this one's mother showed her daughter through silent example that when *she* doesn't always get what she wants, she tries instead to be more appreciative of what she has. How another's father sat him down and told him that everyone loves

what they're best at, which is a blessing, but he should never lord it over people, not necessarily because it would make him a bad person (that was in the subtext) but because if he did, other people's jealousy would always hold him back.

And I thought about how 'diverse yet fortunate parenting' isn't always 'good' parenting. How one of my friends learned to be responsible and solicitous because her father could never take care of himself after her mother died. How another one became goofy and overly gregarious because he inherited his mother's talent for connecting with people, but saw that she was manipulative and swore he'd never be the same. How this one's calmness and humility derive from her troubled childhood, her overbearing parents, and never quite feeling like she was in control of her own life.

It's strange how we become who we are. I know that you can zoom out, see bigger patterns and trends, and talk about what 'good parenting' comprises. But personally I'd rather zoom in and marvel at the improbability of individual lives. It makes me feel grateful for my friends, and to their parents, for making them who they are.